Take the key, throw it away

You ever feel like you've opened your mouth a bit much? I guess for me it's just being a little to open and honest with my husband. I believe in a marriage that there should be nothing hid and things very open. I mean there are circumstances that fine print is included. Over all things can be delt with and handled better being open.

There have been so many times in my life that I've sat back and kept my mouth shut. To this day, there are many silences I regret. Past is past and now is the future. I want to be free to open when the times appropriate and not worry. That is something most wish they could do. We all worry about reactions, feelings, and fear of regret. Don't care much for having that all the time.

In my life, there have been so few people that I can be open with, even if it can be brutal and blunt.Those people I am close to and they treat me the same way. Yes, being open and honest can hurt, but we need that. We learn from our pain and hopefully it goes in the right direction. Sometimes it can go sour for a while. Sometimes it opens a path we never expected to take.Eventually though, even if we don't want to admit it, it has been for the better.

I'm always on the path of learning when it is or isn't appropriate to speak up and be open. Family on my husbands side can be very inappropiate at time with their words. He tells me to do what everyone else does and to not let it bother me. But when I take their lead of voicing "their" type of openess, he get's all hell handed back to him from them. These instances, I'm clueless about. Hopefully there will be a balance between us, learning from each other, and we can all mind ourselves.

Back to the beginning, I think with my husband, it's not about me being overly open or not open at all. I think I need to get rid of the padlock and key. I'm investing in a heavy duty, quality zipper for my mouth. So I can have it partially open, completly closed, or completly open. I won't need to worry about silence anymore. Even with zipper being there, I can still dish it out, just a little bit more quietly.